McSweeney’s iPhone instructions
p2pnet.net News:- To listen to, and watch, the ravings of the lamescream media, Steve ‘DRM’ Jobs’ ?Phone is the greatest thing since Christ performed the Miracle of the Fishes.
So for those of you willing to fork out five huundred dollars, plus taxes, for your very own ?phone, McSweeney’s has posted an instruction set
“Congratulations on your purchase of the 8-gigabyte iPhone from Apple Inc.!” – it says.
“For the first time, you will be able to engage in all the varieties of human interaction through a single device. Please consult the table of contents below for an in-depth look at your iPhone experience.”
Below are five examples to give you an idea of the flavour >>>>>>>>>>>>>>
XI. Using the iPhone to explain how the internal board committee of Apple Computer Inc. (before the name change) headed by Al Gore could exonerate Steve Jobs of any wrongdoing in the options-backdating scandal
XIII. Using the iPhone to take pictures of celebrities without underpants
XV. Using the iPhone to better understand the coming synergies between Disney and Apple, and the fact that no conflicts involving the Sarbanes-Oxley Act will ensue
XVIII. Using the iPhone to learn whether superstring theory’s positing of 10 dimensions (or 11 in M-theory) is viable in light of recent discoveries relating to dark matter
XX. Using the iPhone to find love, true love, love like you’ve never dreamed of
;p
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