p2pnet.net News:- p2pnet readers are nothing, if not alert.

We recently ran an item on the movie studios’ decision to jump Big Music’s band waggon – even though the wheels are falling off.

An unidentified poster has passed along a not entirely unrelated, unidentified story from an unidentified source by and unidentified author.

Read on >>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Sandwich makers announce RIAA-style sue ‘em all campaign

Milford, Conn – November 5, 2004:- Subway ® Restuarants spokesperson Jared Fogle announced today that the restaurant chain will join The Society for the Preservation of American Sandwich Making (SPASM) in pursuing lawsuits against all entities infringing on their copyrighted “sandwiches”.

“We estimate that the industry loses over $1 billion every year in sales lost to home users alone” said Fogle, referring to the practice of placing meats and vegetables between two slices of bread.

“This practice endangers both the livelihoods of our ’sandwich artists’ and indeed, the art of sandwich-making itself. Allowed to continue unchecked, sandwich-making would likely die as an art form altogether.”

US Attorney General John Ashcroft, alongside Fogle for the announcement, unveiled a poster designed to focus awareness on the protection of intellectual property. 50’s TV homemaker Donna Reed is featured among a panoply of sandwich-making items, including Wonder Bread, sandwich meats and various condiments, admonishing young mothers to, “leave the work to the professionals” rather than risk prosecution.

“We will leave no stone unturned, no greasy lunch bag uninspected.” said Ashcroft. “If you think that you’re not being watched, you’re WRONG!”, he exclaimed, wagging his finger at the group of schoolchildren in the front row.

An FBI spokesman estimated that over 300 citizens will be served with subpoenas this week. Those served will initially be charged as “John Does” until legislation forcing schools to identify the makers is passed by noted crimefighter Orrin Hatch.

US Code provides for a fine of up to $150,000 per infringement, although out-of-court settlements are expected to range around $3,000 per defendant.

SPASM is a consortium of legal sandwich-making entities, including Subway ® Restaurants, Quizno’s ® Restaurants, Blimpies ® Restaurants and international megalith Sony-BMG’s sandwich making division.

===================

See:-
band waggon – MPAA to sue file sharers, p2pnet, November 4, 2004
unidentified poster – MPAA to sue file sharers, p2pnet, November 4, 2004

This entry was posted on Sunday, November 7th, 2004 at 8:28 pm and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

HOME

Viewed 2278 times