MPAA Red (BS) Carpet
p2pnet.net News:-A year ago, almost to the day, Hollywood very generously introduced Pause Parent Play, “dedicated to making it easier for parents to choose which movies and TV shows their kids watch, songs they listen to and video games they play,” they say with the MPAA as the front.
Gee, guys, thanks. You’re all heart : )
Now meet the Hollydud MPAA Classification and Rating Administration Red Carpet Ratings service, “committed to providing parents with the information they need to make decisions about their children’s movie going experiences”.
Heh.
No, really! This isn’t a spoof!
"Red Carpet Ratings" service is a, “new email alert service to help keep parents apprised of what the most recently premiered movies are rated,” says the pitch. Just fill out the form and, "each week you will receive an email update detailing what movies are coming out in the theater along with their ratings and their ratings descriptors".
“What more could a responsible parent or guardian ask for?” – wonders Cinematical. “How about MPAA Dan Glickman comes over your house and describes each new release and its assigned rating … every week? “
How about that? Heh.
Or, and still on Red Carepts, maybe get him to play a tune and tell a joke or two, a la:
"Rhoda!" Dan Glickman belted it out. "I’m home!" He slammed the door. "Rhoda gave him the kind of look that only a first wife could conjure. It hooked into his slumping shoulders and reeled back 39 years. There were secrets in her smile, things she knew."
And
"It had been a demanding day for the president of the Motion Picture Association of America, busy in the run-up to the Academy Awards, where he’ll stroll down the red carpet with the stars," says the item, going on that being MPAA president is, "the most glamorous lobbying job in Washington, championing studio lawsuits and fighting piracy," and all …..
Cough, cough..
Meanwhile, “Years ago, when I was all of 11 years old, I have vivid memories of not only convincing my pal Gerard’s ancient Chinese grandma that George Romero’s ‘Day of the Dead’ was essentially ‘Lassie,’ but that she should drive us to the mall, and give us money for tickets and popcorn,” says TMZ.com, going on:.
“ ‘Is it …violent?’ she asked, peering over her wire-rimmed spectacles, hesitating and rightfully suspicious. ‘Absolutely not!’ we chirped, equal parts affronted and doe-eyed, clandestinely imagining the glorious zombie disembowelment that awaited us.
“Well, those glory days ended today, with the announcement from the MPAA that movie ratings will now be available as an email blast sent to busy parents.”
Nor will it end there. Anything which isn’t made by the Big Six could find itself rated out and as a sign of things to come, “Want to send a message across?” – inquires EarthTimes.org.
“Forget banners, sermons, hymns and rallies. Try entertainment. That’s what a church in Albany did. Facing the Giants, a film made by members of the Sherwood Baptist Church, sends out the message of God through entertainment. But like most films, this one, about a football coach who finds God and through Him, success, confidence and peace, was cut to size by the Motion Picture Association of America (MPAA).
“The censor body gave the film a PG (Parental Guidance) rating, a tag usually attached to a film to warn parents that it contains nudity, sexual references, profanity and violence that may not be appropriate for children.
“In the process, the MPAA invited the ire of staunch Christians, who feel the rating has to do is about the film body playing it safe by not promoting a certain religion in the world of political correctness and secularism.
“Not true, says MPAA. According to MPAA president Dan Glickman, the film shows football violence, tackles the issue of infertility and depression, and that’s where the PG rating comes from. The body, which usually stays mum over its decisions, spoke out after receiving over 15,000 emails protesting the PG tag. And a letter from House Majority Whip Roy Blunt, R-Mo, who alleged that the rating shows Hollywood has an anti-Christian bias. ‘This incident raises the disquieting possibility that MPAA considers exposure to Christian themes more dangerous for children than exposure to gratuitous sex and mindless violence,’ he wrote in the letter.”
So, RIP. The MPAA is here, guarding your parental interests.
Also See:
choose which movies – BMPAA ‘Pause Parent Play’, July 22, 19, 2005
Cinematical – MPAA to Email Lazy Parents, July 19, 2006
tell a joke or two – The MPAA’s Vaudeville Dan, February 24, 2006
TMZ.com – MPAA Ends Tradition of Teens Lying to Parents, July 25, 2006
EarthTimes.org – MPAA faces flak over Facing the Giants, July 2, 2006
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July 26th, 2006 at 10:38 am
If parents are that concerned about their children’s cultural consumption, they’d be visiting http://www.capalert.com/ every week.
I too like to visit that site regularly just to remind myself how ludicrous some people can be.
July 26th, 2006 at 11:53 pm
scream about ‘Christianity’!!! There are more Blunts in Missouri politics than you can shake a stick at. All the Blunts have done ‘for’ us here in the State of Missouri is make it Misery.